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Friends of 'flaps...
- they don't pay us - we just like 'em!
Floppettes
This part of the site is dedicated to those snippets of fun stories and
tales, not big enough to warrant a whole article, but funny enough to
get some space here.
Got a funny for floppy flaps?
Click here and tell us about it! and get your name on the list of
fame to go here below. If you really make us laugh then we might just
send you a floppyflaps T shirt for your trouble, so start tappin'!
Scottish Colin, the offshore oil worker; Meg
"Front Loader" Garven; Steve Mitchell; Frank "One Eyed" Rosser -
Sydney Thirsty Hash House Harriers; Willy "Beach" Eaton
Use the Force Luke !
So Mike Downard get his brand new big Jeep with all the gizmos. Now as some of
you (or all of you who know & love him!) Mike never has much luck with anything
that's got an electrical current running through it. If it can be broken / lost
or destroyed, then he's your man. Mike's having fun & games trying to import his
boats & getting an agreed figure from the Thai Customs guy who making him jump
through all the hoops. Having spent the day there, with still no conclusion, he
leaves. He gets in the jeep and reverses - taking car not to hit the car behind
by using his great toy - the proximity detector. If you haven't seen one of
these it's a device that beeps when you get close to an object when reversing.
Nice idea eh?...
However, similarly to the fact that a
depth sounder on a boat doesn't include the length of the keel, the proximity
detector doesn't taker into account the ridiculously huge spare wheel hanging
off the back on the jeep. BANG! Mike not only manages to park the spare wheel
into the car behinds, but into the car belonging to the Customs guy's car from
whom he's just had all the hassle! Try telling him it wasn't deliberate!
Back to using the force & looking over your shoulder then
Mike!!
Source - Steve Mitchell - Now also in Thailand
Here Doggy...doggy....doggy!
When One Eyed was growing up - you know the usual, family pets etc., his
Dad was out one Day down the shopping mall getting the groceries etc.
Anyway, he spied the family Dog up to no good around the car park. He chhases it
for a while cursing at not being able to catch it and how did that d*mn dog get
out of the garden and follow him to the mall anyway etc. etc.
Well, finally he corners it, picks the muted animal up, throws it
into the back of the ute (pickup truck for you non Antipodeans) and drives off
home. He arrives there ready to serve temper on whomever let the dog out and in
the gaarden, still penned in is...... The family Dog!! Picture the poor guy at
the shopping mall. Jeeeez me dog's bin kidnapped! ....
Source - Frank "One Eyed" Rosser - Sydney Thirsty Hash House Harriers
It's a big world- but I wouldn't Like To Know Where It Is! It's pub quiz time down the Harlequin pub in Sydney's
Pyrmont. The question is....
"Which country had the most fatalities during the recent tsunami?"
The answer was Sweden. However one Ozzie girl was heard to say...
"Jeeez - I knew the wave was big, but I didn't know it went that far"
I kid ye not! Frightening eh? Not just the USA who don't know where the world
is!
Source - Through one of Willy "Beach" Eaton's mates;
Thailand's Forensic Farce
Australian student dies in four-story
fall. PATONG: A 23-year-old Australian student died after falling four stories
from his hotel room in the early hours of this morning (Dec 04).Police believe
that Christian Jorgen Halkjaer, from Perth, slipped and fell from the balcony of
his room at the Patong Beach Lodge, Rat-U-Thit 200 Phi Rd, after a night out
with friends.He said that he received a call from the hotel’s security guard at
4 am, and arrived at the scene with a doctor from Patong Hospital about 10
minutes later to find Mr Halkjaer on the ground, dead from a broken neck.
Col Chaowalit said police believe Mr Halkjaer’s death was accidental because
the body was found lying face-up!!!!
Can anyone tell me exactly how you reach a conclusion like that! Of course - No
one ever rolls when falling 4 stories!!
Source- Phuket Gazette
Colin's Karaoke Trip
Our new friend in Phuket, Colin was at (sorry 'his friend' was at...) a
karaoke bar down in deepest South East Asia. Wanting some extra curricular
activities he motioned to the girl near the bar, making a 'bl*w job' type fist
and holding it near his mouth. She duly took his money and led him into a dark
room out the back. Then....on came the light and the music! - She had
misinterpreted the action as his request to sing some private Karaoke! Oops,
schoolboy error!
Source - Colin Frazer, Thailand
Extreme Eyeblinds
Two Nigerian guys were on the flight from Africa. Apparently it's
a nation where they want everything everyone else has. So, when a lady was
caught short of ladies manhole covers (think about it!) on the plane and
whispered her dilemma to the stewardess, this caught their attention. The lady
in question was trying to be as discrete as possible to request a suitable
moppet for her undercarriage.
When the stewardess
brought one for her, the gentlemen observing insisted (without knowing what it
was), that they too should have whatever was going free. No amount of convincing
by the stewardess - without actually telling them what it was, seemed to work.
Ok, she though, you got it SIR! So, off she duly went....
10 mins later the Stewardess is hailing her buddies to check
out seats 34h & J. There they were sound asleep - the 2 Nigerian Guys with brand
new (and clean I hope) sticky eye masks!
Source- Frontloader (Meg, Sydney)
